What Kind Of Fudge Is Forgiveness, Anyway? - How I Came To Forgive the Things I Couldn't Forget
Dear Henry, As a person who has gone through some significant traumas in my life ( you can read about them here ), forgiveness is a word that gets brought up a lot. So much so that I wonder if people even understand what that word means, and there are some days I want to shout the word of Inigo Montoya and say, "You keep using that word; I do not think it means what you think it means." I know I didn't understand what forgiveness meant for the longest time. The definition of forgiveness I was taught was the definition abused children everywhere are taught. Forgiveness meant you stopped crying and pretend everything was ok and that nothing terrible had happened. Relationships restarted immediately, and there were no repercussions to the offending party. Let me tell you straight up; that definition is entirely and unequivocally false. My journey to forgiveness began with establishing the proper definition of the word because, as Joan Didion wrote in Slouching Toward Bethle...